
- Don’t expect to find the woman of your dreams in dubious environments or in places that don’t reflect your value system
This includes for some the nightclub and bar scene, although these are great places to practice talking to the opposite sex without too much investment. If the energy is coming from a low vibration, e.g. from a place which you don’t respect, you can’t expect to find someone you respect either. No true connection comes from the bottom of a vodka bottle on Saturday night. If there is a situation where one party is not present because they are intoxicated, drugged out, hung over, on Mars, it’s probably best to take a rain check until they’ve sobered up, and you can properly judge the real person.Join a social club, sports club or special interest group that reflects your interests and values. You will most likely find someone with common interests that you can spend time with and get to know over time. - Expand your idea/criteria of what is the ‘right’ woman
This is dependent on your level of maturity and emotional evolvement. If you base your criteria of the right women on only physical characteristics, watch yourself slip into boredom and emotional dissatisfaction fast. Think about what the right person really means to you: what kind of values does she hold? What sort of person do you really want to spend time with? What kind of woman would you treat with respect?When you start looking for these valued characteristics, and start narrowing these down to a few core ones, you will get more confident at eliminating those who are not a match, and get closer to finding the right person for you. However it does require you to be firm and decisive. - Become the person you want to go out with.
If you don’t reflect the person you want to go out with, why should anyone give that back to you? You have to ask yourself, what is it about me that someone would want? In a way, you’re selling a package: looks, energy, personality and everything else. Become the package you want to buy; if you don’t believe in the product and buy it yourself, why should anyone else? - Be open to opportunities anywhere anytime. Pick up cues when people show interest.
We can be easily blindsided by our own ideas of what we are looking for, not realising at times that the opportunities present itself right in front of us. See every moment as an opportunity to make a connection with someone and you’ll find yourself a step closer to meeting the right person. - Retain your self confidence even when you hear a ‘no’. The right woman will come along and give you that ‘yes’ in the end.
Despite what most men commonly feel when rejected, a man’s self worth shouldn’t be wrapped up in whether a woman rejects or accepts him. The sexiest men are the ones with the appearance of not caring. It creates an irresistible energy of self confidence and we want some of that! Don’t take a ‘no’ personally. It just might not be a match, in her mind, and as mentioned previously, it may not be a definitive ‘no’ but may need time to incubate. I can assure you however that the more clearer and confident you are in yourself, the more quickly you will find someone who loves and appreciates you as much as you love and appreciate yourself. - Learn to move on quickly and try again with someone else.
Rejection feels bad but nothing reeks more than desperation, or worse, prolonged despondency. I’ve lost count of the number of times I heard this one : “They couldn’t stop talking about their ex.” It’s kind of the same pain in relation to someone who can’t get over rejection. I know this is hard to hear but they weren’t that special, and if you change your scarcity mentality to one of abundance, you’ll soon realise that and remember the remaining 3 billion human beings left in the world you could be potentially matched with. So seriously, don’t get cut up over one or two knock backs. People with a healthy level of self worth and self confidence pick themselves up again and move forward and find someone. Life presents new opportunities every day, it’s up to you to look out for them.
Remember that the right person:
- won’t make life impossible for you, and make you work for their attention, whilst still being disinterested
- will accept you as you are
- won’t drop you on your ass at the first sign of a challenging situation
- will take a chance on you
- won’t judge you against their past partners and impossible criteria